when I bring in an xref it puts it out of the way somewhere far removed from the drawing,

even when I specify, it's the same

on similar note, when I copy something in the drawing, it does the same thing.

I'm working with small, simple drawings,  largest is a 4x12" object.  the objects being xref'd or copied are way out there, zooming out to extents is the only way to find 'em and they're tiny dots.